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“He that is slow to anger is better than the mighty; and he that ruleth his spirit than he that taketh a city” (Proverbs 16: 32) 

It is much easier to subdue an enemy without than one within.  Many kings have conquered nations, yet were slaves to their own passions.  One example was Alexander the Great who conquered the world; in a fit of anger, he slew Clytus his closest friend, and one he loved dearly.

“Anger strikes the fire which sets cities and churches into flame” – Matthew Henry.  It takes only one angry person to destroy a family or church.  Such are the hurtful effects of uncontrolled anger.

How do we manage this sinful passion?  What biblical steps can we take to keep anger in check?

Last week, we discussed the first step - know the dangers of uncontrolled anger.  An angry person “dealeth foolishly” (Prov. 14: 17); “exalteth folly” (Prov. 14: 29);  “stirreth up strife” and “aboundeth in transgression” (Prov. 29: 22).  Ultimately, such a person “troubleth his own flesh” (Prov. 11: 17) and embitters his life.  Moreover, failure to exercise self-control can mar our Christian witness.

“The person with uncontrolled temper is a danger to everyone including himself (italics mine).  The worst of slaves is he whom passion rules” - P. Brooks. 

2.  Know ourselves

Since the problem stems from within us, we need to know our strengths and weaknesses.  Whereas it is easy for others to correctly assess us, self-examination is often difficult in that we find excuses for our words and actions.  Look in the mirror of God’s Word to see our true selves. Let God’s light shine into our soul as we check our lives.  Ask ourselves: Am I hypersensitive?  Am I easily offended/provoked by others?  Do I harbour a bitter, unforgiving spirit?  Do I have a quick temper?  Am I proud?  A proud person is a contentious person.  Proverbs tells us that “only by pride cometh contention” (Prov. 13: 10). 

If we have the above-mentioned negative habits, we need to consciously check our reactions.  Cultivate a desire to respond in a God-honouring way.  Use soft words; deal gently in any situation: “A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger”  (Prov. 15: 1). 

3.   Be ready to forgive

Learn to overlook the faults and weaknesses of those around us.  One proverb says it well: “Do not make a mountain out of a mole hill.”   “The discretion of a man deferreth his anger; and it is his glory to pass over a transgression” (Prov. 19:11).  “Let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath” (Jas. 1: 19). 

We are not perfect. We have, on many occasions, offended others.  Very often, we see the mote that is in our brother’s eye, and fail to consider the beam that is in our own eye (Matt. 7: 3).  The next time we encounter some provoking situation, consider what we have just studied.  May the Lord help us to be kind and gracious in our dealings that we might not sin against Him.

Take time to think of the grace of the Lord.  He has forgiven us much (Matt. 18: 35).  In return, let us learn how to love and forgive others.

4.  Yield to the Holy Spirit

God has given us the power of the Holy Spirit to keep our emotions under control.  On our part, we must yield to His Spirit and not to the lusts of the flesh.  Cultivate a consciousness of the Holy Spirit.  Seek His strength and help to overcome this serious sin:  “This I say then, Walk in the Spirit, and ye shall not fulfil the lust of the flesh.  For the flesh lusteth against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh: and these are contrary the one to the other: so that ye cannot do the things that ye would” (Gal. 5: 16-17). 

Let us be mindful also to keep a close walk with the Lord.  Resolve to keep our time with the Lord in prayer and the reading of His Word.  May the study of God’s Word transform our lives from within by the power of His Word and His Spirit. 

We conclude with some useful counsel from William Burkitt:

o Desire not to hear what others say of thee, lest you want patience to bear what you hear; many tear themselves with anger, when they hear themselves torn with slander; we had better be in the dark concerning our own wrongs, than by knowing of them wrong ourselves by passion or desire of revenge.

o What you do hear said of you, interpret always in the most favourable sense; call it an infirmity, and distinguish between what is spoken and the intent of the speaker.

o In and under all provocations, cast your eye upward, look up to God; and cast your eye inward, and see what you have deserved; though not at your neighbour’s hand, yet at God’s hand. Shimei gave David provocation to boil up his anger to the height of fury (II Sam. 16: 5-14), but by eyeing God, how calm and meek was his spirit!  Thus, be angry, and sin not.

- Pastor